I have avoided the subject and really just tried to ignore the fact that I have gained so much weight over the past 6 years. I am extremely happy with my life with the exception of this one not so little thing.....my HUGE ass (not to mention my health). I have tried so many diets, pills, shakes, juices, and fads. I hired a trainer (which I quickly proceeded to tell to "F&%* OFF") and I have told my sweet husband to limit my intake of everything bad for me, which worked for about 15 seconds until he actually did exactly what I told him to and said "no" (which I very swiftly replied to with a not so sweet, "F&*% OFF") as if it was his fault that I was asking to eat my weight in french fries dipped in ranch dressing. But, the thing is, I just don't feel like myself anymore... I used to be cute....not gorgeous or anything, but cute. A solid 7 before these 70 pounds found me. I enjoyed shopping, getting my hair done, new clothes and when I got out of the car at a gas station, men noticed....not "Hey baby, let me get your number" noticed, but still...noticed. Now, I can almost hear there thoughts... "Hey baby, how about another twinkie " EWWWWWW!!! not that I need the approval of a man, I am a very happily married woman, but it's one of those things I have just noticed...
To add insult to injury, the doctor recently advised me it really wouldn't be safe to try to get pregnant right now because of all the lovely, lets say,"fluff" I have....NICE!!!! My cholesterol levels are that of a 400lb, 60 year old man and I guess that is somewhat of a concern...DUH!!!
I do understand, although I was still in serious denial. I wasted so much time convincing myself that "Fat women have babies all the time right?" WRONG!!!! not the healthy pregnancies with minimum risk to the mother let alone the risk to the baby that I am hoping for. All my other test results were fine, as much as I would LOVE to blame this weight thing on a thyroid problem or at this point even a mental disorder because it can't possibly be that I am just lazy and eat way too much of the wrong thin right??? I don't feel lazy though. I work very hard at my job and the side business I am trying to build. I work hard at my relationships, my friendships and my faith. But, maybe that is just another excuse I create to consume myself with anything other than the elephant in the room...ME!
So, after all the internal struggles, the arguments I have with myself (which I am VERY good at) and the lectures from parents, doctors and friends...I'm doing it!!! This time for real, and this time, the right way! I am sincerely praying this blog helps us out, even if no one but us reads it. I need the motivation and staying power. God knows, I have tried everything else. So, the plan is Weight Watchers for the food control and relearning how to eat along with our new Kinect for the exercise plan. Also, this competition with Daley and Royce is serious motivation for me and Jay! We have set our goal and we have to see it through.
I started two days ago with Weight Watchers, counting points, no more sugar, no more sodas and no more fast food. We are also starting with our first workout tonight and I am going to put everything I have into this... I hope Jay will want to do it with me, but if not, I am on my own and fine with it. This new "me" is going to take a lot. Time, energy and will power (VERY worried about that one. But, I keep hearing my parents in my ear saying something like "Katie, you can do anything you set your mind to". Well, I'm counting on it!! Plus, the best news of all is that I have my best friend here cheering me on (well, competing with me, but still cheering me on). Someone who I know and knows ME as well as getting our husbands involved this time around what I affectionately call my, "Fatso Merry Go'round"....This is going to be life changing for all four of us! I just KNOW it!
To add insult to injury, the doctor recently advised me it really wouldn't be safe to try to get pregnant right now because of all the lovely, lets say,"fluff" I have....NICE!!!! My cholesterol levels are that of a 400lb, 60 year old man and I guess that is somewhat of a concern...DUH!!!
I do understand, although I was still in serious denial. I wasted so much time convincing myself that "Fat women have babies all the time right?" WRONG!!!! not the healthy pregnancies with minimum risk to the mother let alone the risk to the baby that I am hoping for. All my other test results were fine, as much as I would LOVE to blame this weight thing on a thyroid problem or at this point even a mental disorder because it can't possibly be that I am just lazy and eat way too much of the wrong thin right??? I don't feel lazy though. I work very hard at my job and the side business I am trying to build. I work hard at my relationships, my friendships and my faith. But, maybe that is just another excuse I create to consume myself with anything other than the elephant in the room...ME!
So, after all the internal struggles, the arguments I have with myself (which I am VERY good at) and the lectures from parents, doctors and friends...I'm doing it!!! This time for real, and this time, the right way! I am sincerely praying this blog helps us out, even if no one but us reads it. I need the motivation and staying power. God knows, I have tried everything else. So, the plan is Weight Watchers for the food control and relearning how to eat along with our new Kinect for the exercise plan. Also, this competition with Daley and Royce is serious motivation for me and Jay! We have set our goal and we have to see it through.
I started two days ago with Weight Watchers, counting points, no more sugar, no more sodas and no more fast food. We are also starting with our first workout tonight and I am going to put everything I have into this... I hope Jay will want to do it with me, but if not, I am on my own and fine with it. This new "me" is going to take a lot. Time, energy and will power (VERY worried about that one. But, I keep hearing my parents in my ear saying something like "Katie, you can do anything you set your mind to". Well, I'm counting on it!! Plus, the best news of all is that I have my best friend here cheering me on (well, competing with me, but still cheering me on). Someone who I know and knows ME as well as getting our husbands involved this time around what I affectionately call my, "Fatso Merry Go'round"....This is going to be life changing for all four of us! I just KNOW it!
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